During one of my postpartum meetings with a client early on in my career we reminisced about their pregnancy. They mentioned some hurtful words that were said from a stranger during an emotional breakdown in the grocery store at 33 weeks. The store was out of Red Raspberry Leaf tea and my client REALLY needed that tea. They read not only can it soften the cervix but it can also help ease emotions and relax any anxious thoughts that can come up during pregnancy. After a short 5 minute ‘why can’t this baby be out nooooow’ sobbing with goop dripping down their neck, they heard a bystander next to them in the coffee & tea aisle speak a little too loud: “Pregnant people need to seriously calm down…”
Ouch, that sounds a little rude doesn’t it ?
In a way…it’s true. Over the last 2 years of my birth work I’ve noticed that a calm birther is one of the best ingredients for cookin’ up a blissful birth experience.
Now of course this isn’t easy, especially for first time parents. It also isn’t easy for insanely busy parents with 2 kids already on the go. I understand it can seriously be a struggle to find some serenity with a little one in utero.
One of the biggest complaints I get from clients is “I’m so flippin’ moody!” or “I have no idea how my partner puts up with me some days” or even better “Hey Madison, I feel like I’m gonna punch someone in the face every 50 seconds, is this normal?”
My question to them is usually this: When was the last time you checked in with your body and your baby?
Yes, your hormones are in fact having a crazy dance party and your mood swings are bound to be intense. But remember, there’s a heck of a lot changing within your body!
And so, I find my clients frantically searching for ideas to help calm their moods. For example: ‘a swift walk’ (does swift waddle count?)…’12 smoothies to help ease pregnancy jitters’…’read a book that isn’t pregnancy related’ (as if Nora Roberts is gonna calm them down)…’take a walk in nature’ (okay, this is a good idea)…’meditate’ (this takes a lot of practice)…’ground yourself’ (again, this takes practice)…’drink more tea’…’eat more vegetables’ (okay thanks mom)…. the list is endless.
Although some listed here may be true to achieving some relaxation – the camomile and liquid chlorophyll smoothie seriously sounded delicious… most of these ideas are band-aids. These options are just temporarily calming the mind, body, and their baby’s spirit. Brief enough fixes for them to get one or two deep breaths into their lungs and then it’s back to their haywire of a day.
But I get it, they’re “busy” and also terrified. Feeling anxious is super normal during pregnancy – for both the baby bearer and partner ! But that doesn’t mean it’s a good idea to burn your eyes looking at a screen, searching desperately how to relax and find inner peace.
So here’s my two cents on how to calm the fudge down: put the book away, the phone or whatever it is that’s got you feeling on edge. Disconnect from everything externally and focus internally… ahhh… there it is…………. A little less “ummmmm?” and a lot more “ooohhhmmmmmm….”
Tap in and find your inner guru for Pete’s sake (and your partners sake).
One thing that can initiate this calm state of mind is with the ancient practice of Reiki Energy Healing. I know, it was huge in the 90’s and trust me it’s making a come back.
Lucky for my clients I can provide and guide this practice. I’m a healer. I was called by a master healer a year ago and was trained to practice Reiki healing on people. And I love it ! And when I get to practice on pregnant people I’m in heaven. They’re in heaven too.
As a certified reiki healer I feel blessed to be able to share this sense of divine calm. I believe pregnant people and expecting families deserve Reiki the most.
You can check out my website here: odetobirth.com
“With each balancing and healing Reiki session, a birthing person’s soul will take the time to relax and let go of any unnecessary energetic blocks – making space for a deeper connection between them and baby.”
Doesn’t that sound awesome ?! I can almost guarantee a birther is less inclined to have grocery store emotional breakdowns after a few sessions.
I also teach pre and post natal yoga. But we’ll save more of that relaxing juju for another blog.
Reiki Energy Healer
Pre/Post Natal Instructor